We have all seen the commercials, sappy and blurry, that declare two months of salary is the appropriate amount to spend on engagement rings. Are they nuts?! A much better investment of that money is called a down payment if you ask me. Fortunately, there are ways to get a beautiful engagement ring for much less and frankly. So if your fiancee is demanding you spend that much on a ring, you may want to think things through a bit more.
Save Money with an Heirlooms Engagement Ring
The best way to save money is to not spend it. If you have a family heirloom sitting around you may want to consider giving it to your bride instead of purchasing something new. If your fiancee is the sentimental type, getting an heirloom will be much more special to her than getting a new ring. On the other hand, with half of all marriages ending in divorce, you need to realize you may not get the ring back if things go sour.
Doing your research before you buy a ring
Before you even step out the door to look at rings you need to do a bit of research. The four C’s of diamond buying are Cut, Color, Clarity and Carat. Cut refers to the shape of the stone, color its shade; clarity describes any inclusions and carat the size. Stones of the same size are not necessarily worth the same if their color or clarity varies.
While a D color is considered the highest quality, a J is nearly as colorless and a lot less expensive. Since the stone will rest in a setting and is not an investment piece, pick a “darker” color and save yourself a bundle. The same is true for clarity; small inclusions may drop the value of a stone, but in a setting are rarely noticeable.
Editor’s Note: I disagree with the author here. Diamonds are like everything else. The more you know about them, the higher your sensitivity and awareness for its differences. If you look, the higher quality diamonds are shinier and look whiter/brighter. The key is to figure out what you are comfortable spending while being mindful of your future wife’s expectations.
Search for prices of loose stones online. Loose stones are easier to assess than mounted stones and you can customize the ring from every aspect. This also gives you a chance to price rings without pressure, but you are still better off going to the source when you buy.
How to choose the diamond and setting
If you are taking your sweetheart with you, remember that you will look decisive instead of cheap if you know your limits. If you plan to shop alone, you avoid the problem all together. Determine just how much you are willing to spend before you walk in a store or you might find yourself spending more than you want, and avoid mall stores and chains like the plague.
Ask to see unmounted stones so you can evaluate them clearly. Bring along a magnifying glass of at least 10x, that is the industry standard by the way. Ask for the cut you wish to see and evaluate each stone for clarity and color. Once you find your stone and price it, you know how much you can spend on your setting.
Editor’s Note: You should only buy diamonds that have a Gemological Institute of America (GIA) report, which grades each stone and gives a detailed report, as well as provide a international standard for pricing purposes. There is also a pricing guide based on the four Cs, but take that price like the “manufacturer’s suggested retail price”, or the list price, which no one really pays for.
Settings can run the gamut from a traditional, simple one stone ring to modern diamond encrusted bands. Consider your beloved’s taste when purchasing and stick to your budget.
Save money by paying cash
Since many small stores need to pay commission on credit card purchases, ask if you can get a discount for paying in cash or check. You may be able to save a percent or two, not an insignificant amount on such a large purchase. Never go into debt to purchase this ring, it is expensive enough without interest. In the end, this ring is a symbol of your love, not an opportunity to show off.
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{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }
That’s right, like nearly everything else, don’t buy it unless you can pay cash for it. I know some women who do not prefer diamonds but birthstones. Birthstones are beautiful, much less expensive, and more personalized.
Ditto with Jersey Mom…. who says it has to be a diamond? I wanted sapphires with diamond chips on the side…. Very affordable.
And who says HE has to pay for the whole thing??? He has a budget, I had a budget, and together I bought what I wanted. If either one of you is thinking that you have to spend way too much money on a way over budget glitzy diamond, then you’d better take that as a warning sign that the financial road may be rocky ahead and that your financial priorities might not be the same.
You might want to try craigslist, ebay, or your local pawn shop for great deals also. The pawn shops in Reno especially are great places to buy jewelry
Remember most any ring can be resized to fit.
People didn’t understand why I wanted such a small diamond. I have a small diamond- peppercorn sized, surrounded by 25 tiny diamonds. And you know what? It cost a fraction of other diamond rings, is beautiful, and doesn’t mean my husband loves me any less. Big flashy diamonds are overrated, in my opinion.
My friend went with her fiance to pick a ring and the sales person actually told the couple that a smaller diamond looked better on her.
I think my friend must’ve paid him money to say that, or that he was the only honest salesman out there.
If you just walk in a jewelry store you are going to pay top dollar. There are cheaper stones online and most jewelers will set them for you. Also, if you happen to be traveling overseas, sometimes you can find cheaper diamonds outside of the US.
Whoever thinks a J color diamond is “nearly” as colorless a D color diamond is delusional. Has the author actually looked at the two side by side? There’s a very noticable difference, even to the untrained eye. When shopping for a diamond, you should get the best quality that fits within your budget. And take into account the style that the bride likes. As mentioned above, some brides prefer colored stones or pave diamonds, rather than solitaire diamonds. Regarding color and cut, the more colorless the diamond, the smaller/fewer the inclusions, and the better the cut (i.e. Proportions), the sparklier the diamond. Which means that you can often get a smaller diamond/ lower carat weight because the sparkle makes the diamond appear larger. I highly recommend Union Diamond, an online store that also has a showroom in Atlanta. Their diamond prices are near wholesale and they were a pleasure to work with when DH and I were designing my custom e-ring. Based on remarks from friends and jewelers, we paid probably half what we would’ve paid for the same ring elsewhere. And, they do give a cash discount for paying via wire rather than credit card, which helps a bit.
If your future wife is “demanding” a ring and trying to dictate what you should pay, it is time to rethink more than just the ring.
I don’t know anyone who’ve followed the two month’s salary rule, even though it’s such a wide spread “gimmick”.
Then again, most people could do much better buying the diamond by itself and then going somewhere else to get the ring on too, but like everything else, the cheaper way always takes more work.
Great topic. I thought it was 3 months salary. Regardless, I do think that’s a bit much and I love the heirloom idea. I am a sentimental gal so that would mean the world to me even if it didn’t cost a lot.
I’m glad that I stumbled across this article because I would have spent a lot of money on the engagement ring.
Great post. I particularly agree with the point that if your fiancee is demanding you spend a whooping figure on a ring, you may want to think things through a bit more.
Commercials like that infuriate me.
It’s that sort of thing that makes people overspend unnecessarily. Why should weddings and engagement come down to finances anyway? The pressure to spend, spend, spend when the global economy is only just beginning its recovery and when unemployment is so, so high is just irresponsible and inappropriate.
Excellent to see you recommending cash payments. People getting into credit card debt for an engagement ring is very worrying indeed.
If she wants that nice big engagement ring.. get it. its really that simple. this is something she has to look at (hopefully) the rest of her life.
she should get what she loves.. and if she happens to love tiny diamonds.. then you might be considered “”lucky”" but if she doesn’t: GET OVER IT.
i honestly feel like the 2 month salary is NOT THAT MUCH.
lets think about it this way:
2 months/12 months = ~ .16 of your entire years salary.
lets say you work for 35 years: 2months/(35*12)=0.0048
this is .5% of your total salary! assuming you still make the same amount you did when you first bought her the ring!